Lullaby of Tears
by Little-Retard
Summary: To say that anyone understood Tony was a complete understatement. No one looked close enough to even see a tear in his armor. A fallen soldier, drowning in his tears, drowning in the rain...
1. Chapter 1

The rain down harshly on his clear windows, his brown eyes staring out, cutting clear out across the city, always seeing something no one else did. Half-lidded, his eyes flickered to the water down below and a sigh escaped his full lips.

The huge tower he resided in was silent, not a sound was made. All the machinery in the huge tower was shut down in honor of his need for peace. Some nights he needed this. Some nights he couldn't take all the responsibility he had to take.

All the other Avengers were out at a party that he had left early. Loki was out with Pepper, probably shopping at some expensive store using his unlimited supply of cash to purchase more clothes.

It'd been two years since their defeat of Loki and since then, Loki had joined their side, only because of his adopted brother, Thor. The party was to celebrate this defeat. He doubted anyone noticed he had left.

Turning away from the window, he pressed his back to the wall, sliding down to the floor. His arms wrapped tightly around his knees, pulling them tightly to his chest. He rested his head on his jean- clad knees.

His arc reactor glowed a soft neon blue, lighting up the room. His tears dripped silently onto his knees and arms, drowning in the fabric, lost without a trace. A sob was released from his lips, giving way to cascades of tears and memories that refused to stop.

He sometimes wished he would've died in Afghanistan. At least then he wouldn't have to deal with the pain he was in now, wouldn't have to deal with bothering with everything, everyone who didn't want him here.

He remembered Afghanistan, how he got his arc reactor, how he lost his heart, his painful childhood, his father, the war, the countless failures, the harsh words said, anything and everything that could never be fixed, things that contributed to creating this broken man.

He pressed the palm of his hand to the glowing arc reactor, letting out another sob.

'_You will never amount to anything!'_

'_You're a failure.'_

'_I wish you were never born.'_

'_Die, you stupid runt!'_

'_If it weren't for the fact that we need you to make the damn weapons, I would've killed you already.'_

'_You're a heartless bastard, Tony! You'll never be able to love anyone, and no one will ever be able to love you!'_

The tears were his only lullaby, his fears hushed his screams, the rain drowning out his sobbing, washing away the sounds of a fallen soldier.

* * *

**I don't own The Avengers.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Since you all asked, this is the sequel to **_**Lullaby of Tears**_**.**

* * *

People laughing at inane maturity faded into the background as Steve slowly sipped at his drink. Everything seemed to go in slow motion as his eyes caught Thor's, whose dull reality was just the same as his, colorless and gray, running in slow motion.

Thor's head turned meeting Bruce's, whose turned to meet Clint's, whose turned to meet Natasha's. The party raged on in full, drunk people giggling and leaving to fuck. It was all a dull murmur to the Avenger's, whose minds were locked on the man who seemed not to appear once again.

Thor longed to be with Loki, who had slipped out with Pepper earlier to go shopping to drown their sorrows in expensive tastes.

Tony had all but disappeared after what they'd done to him. They don't blame him. Honestly, they wished they'd never done it. In their rage, their words had struck home, and their words had stolen Tony away from them. Tony had retreated into himself.

He was reclusive. The Avengers just weren't the Avengers without Tony there. Parties just weren't parties without him. Jokes weren't as funny, movies weren't as happy, meals weren't as celebratory.

The days were longer and more depressing.

A loud crash brought Steve out of his revere. Looking around, he realized by the shattered glass on the perfect snowy marble flooring in front him; he had dropped his empty vodka cup.

Bending down to clean it up, he felt a sharp twinge of pain in his finger. Studying the crimson slowly building with his sky blue eyes, he sighed, letting his eyes close.

Leaving the glass on the floor, Steve left the party, the rest of the Avengers following him. The party continued as it always did, loud, bright, and fast.

Things just weren't the same anymore.

* * *

His tears began to slowly dry on his face after hours and hours of crying. Wiping his face with his ruined shirt, Tony let out a shivering sob.

Getting to his wobbly feet, he walked over to his mirror. Picking up a towel and wetting it, he began working on getting rid of the traces that he was ever crying. Dabbing at his eyes with the wet towel, he began to talk softly to himself.

"Everything will be okay. Someday your shining knight will come and sweep you off your feet and you'll never be sad ever again. You'll never be alone again, you'll be warm, you'll never have to worry about how to get back home…"

Sighing softly, he put down the towel, he looked himself in the eyes. "Who am I trying to fool?"

Suddenly, his door banged against the wall, making him jump and spin around with wide eyes to face the five people in his doorway, staring at him with eyes of steel.

"Tony, we need to talk."


End file.
